*Terry Gitano

"Its Dwarf, not Midget, Fuckface!"


Terry Gitano’s personality is far bigger than his 3’5" stature. He’s quick to correct anyone who calls him a midget, and curses more than any sailor around. He jokes freely about his size, but won’t let others do the same unless he knows them well.

Terry is an expert at getting into and out of places, especially small confined spaces. He claims that he honed those skills escaping the jealous husbands and boyfriends of the many women he was fucking, but nobody knows for sure. He’s got enough balls that he might just be telling the truth.

On one of his expeditions, Terry acquired a naginata, which is a Japanese halberd or pole-arm with a curved sword blade at the end. The weapon looks even more absurdly long and unwieldy in Terry’s hands, but he uses it expertly to keep the “deadite bastards” from getting too close to him. Besides, when he’s sneaking somewhere, it doesn’t do him “any good to set off explosions or fire noisy machine guns; that’s not very sneaky, now is it, asshole?!?”

Terry’s best friend and closest companion is a pit bull named Chopper. Nobody’s ever seen Chopper attack anybody, though Terry threatens to tell him to “Sic balls” whenever anybody pisses him off. Terry’s closest human friend is Chinelo Martinez.

*Terry Gitano

Beyond the Sea DarrenGMiller